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Two and a Half Men

Two and a Half Men

S1 · E1

IMDB:

7.4
Two and a Half Men

Released

9/22/2003

Duration

0h 21m

Genre

Comedy

Country

United States of America

Cast

Ashton Kutcher, Jon Cryer, Conchata Ferrell

Overview

A hedonistic jingle writer's free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.

Episodes

PilotEP 1Available

Pilot

23m6.5

Carefree jingle writer Charlie Harper has his lifestyle altered when his uptight brother and his 10-year-old nephew move in with him.

Big Flappy BastardsEP 2Available

Big Flappy Bastards

21m7.2

Despite warnings from Charlie, Jake continues to feed seagulls on the deck and the birds invade the house. Meanwhile, Charlie thinks Judith is taking advantage of Alan, who keeps going to her house to fix things.

Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of HellEP 3Available

Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell

21m7.3

Jake wants to go home to his mom after he gets sick, prompting Alan to think he's a failure as a husband and now as a father.

If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a NapEP 4Available

If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap

21m7.6

Charlie can't function when his housekeeper storms off because of Alan's constant complaints, so Alan tries desperately to woo her back. Meanwhile, Rose comes to Charlie for dating advice.

The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a HumpEP 5Available

The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a Hump

19m7.3

Alan and Charlie have encounters with some highly libidinous soccer moms, but with two very different outcomes.

Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?EP 6Available

Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?

21m6.8

The guys go to Evelyn's house to meet the new man she's dating, and Charlie realizes the man's daughter is a woman he's trying to avoid.

If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually FakeEP 7Available

If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake

21m7.6

Judith is upset with Alan and Charlie when she learns that a surfer who uses Charlie's shower walks around half naked in front of Jake . Then Alan's worried when Judith and the surfer become friends.

Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-FulEP 8Available

Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-Ful

19m7.2

Alan tricks Charlie into joining him and Judith in leading Jake and his classmates in the school's annual music show.

Phase One, CompleteEP 9Available

Phase One, Complete

21m6.8

Charlie is convinced that a woman who spent the night with him wants to turn their relationship into something serious after she befriends Jake and Evelyn.

Merry ThanksgivingEP 10Available

Merry Thanksgiving

21m7.1

Realizing he's losing someone special, Charlie plans a Thanksgiving dinner to convince her he's a family guy and that she should be with him.

Alan Harper, Frontier ChiropractorEP 11Available

Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor

20m6.9

When Alan is surprised to see that Judith has had a makeover and is dating a man, he decides to have Charlie help him transform his image.

Camel Filters and PheromonesEP 12Available

Camel Filters and Pheromones

21m7.0

Berta's granddaughter spends the day at Charlie's, which isn't a problem until he learns she's a beautiful, rebellious 16-year-old.

Sarah Like Puny AlanEP 13Available

Sarah Like Puny Alan

20m6.7

Charlie nurses an ailing Alan back to health so they can go on a double date with two sisters, one of whom Charlie's been wanting to date for a long time.

I Can't Afford HyenasEP 14Available

I Can't Afford Hyenas

21m6.8

Charlie's financial manager informs the carefree jingle writer that he spends money faster than his royalty checks come in, and now he must go on a budget.

Round One to the Hot Crazy ChickEP 15Available

Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick

21m6.9

Charlie invites a mysterious, slightly crazed woman to stay at the house until she can settle some family problems.

That Was Saliva, AlanEP 16Available

That Was Saliva, Alan

21m7.0

Charlie is perplexed when Frankie, the mysterious woman temporarily living in the Harper household, begins falling for Alan and not him.

Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the HatsEP 17Available

Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats

20m7.3

Charlie's still brooding over Alan's choice of their cousin as Jake's guardian if both parents die when the boy has an accident while in his care and has to be rushed to the hospital.

An Old Flame with a New WickEP 18Available

An Old Flame with a New Wick

21m7.1

Charlie is stunned to learn his ex-girlfriend is now a man.

I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember YouEP 19Available

I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You

19m7.2

Judith's devious siren sister stirs things up at Jake's 11th birthday party when she hits on Alan. Meanwhile, Evelyn brings alcohol and has a party of her own.

Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the DarkEP 20Available

Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark

21m6.9

Jake's sullen mood baffles and bothers the family and prompts Alan and Judith to take him to a child psychologist.

No Sniffing, No WowingEP 21Available

No Sniffing, No Wowing

21m6.9

Charlie plays a tricky game when he gets involved with Alan's divorce lawyer, who could make things difficult for Alan if she were, say, dumped by a self-centered lothario.

My Doctor Has a Cow PuppetEP 22Available

My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet

21m6.7

When Charlie discovers that Alan is sleepwalking, he believes it's related to his brother's lack of sex following his divorce, and comes up with a cure.

Just Like BuffaloEP 23Available

Just Like Buffalo

21m7.4

When Jake repeats one of Charlie's sexist remarks in front of Judith's support group, the women convince Judith to stop Jake's visits with his dad and Charlie.

Can You Feel My Finger?EP 24Available

Can You Feel My Finger?

21m7.0

Charlie has a pregnancy scare involving one of his one-night stands and decides to go for the big "V," and we're not talking Vegas.

Cast

Ashton Kutcher

Walden Schmidt

Ashton Kutcher

Jon Cryer

Alan Harper

Jon Cryer

Conchata Ferrell

Berta

Conchata Ferrell

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